You Should Date Yourself
People always talk about themselves generally in a negative way, saying they're their own worst enemy. I say it doesn't have to be that way.
I think we are so accustomed to being mean to ourselves that it starts to become this self-fulfilling prophecy. You start to see yourself as worthless, lazy, incompetent, whatever. We tend to not be very nice to ourselves, and it deteriorates our own mental state.
When we don't value ourselves, we tend to also devalue others. When we speak negatively about ourselves, we are essentially calling people who are about us liars. And we start to put ourselves in worse relationships because we don't also value ourselves. We stay in bad spots because we feel it's what we deserve. But I think you deserve better than that.
I'm an only child. I got pretty accustomed to being by myself for long stretches of time. I tended to be on the outskirts of most social groups for a long time, and often found myself with only me and my internal monologue. So, I would just go do stuff by myself.
I take myself out to lunch, to dinner. I go out and see movies by myself. I go out and do things and enjoy my own solitude. I make jokes at my own expense. I think we can see a lot of benefit in romanticizing a relationship with ourselves.
When we see ourselves as someone we care about, we hold ourselves to a higher standard. We begin to value our worth more. We refuse to settle for people who try and diminish that.
I feel like if you have a good relationship with yourself, you tend to stop and wonder. You want better for yourself, like you would for your close friends. If you're in a relationship with someone who doesn't value you or isn't good for you, it becomes easier to recognize that. It's no different than if your friend was in a toxic relationship and tried to help them see that they deserve better.
I'm not saying be an egoist and think you're hot shit. I'm not advising you to be like Narcissus after discovering himself. You don't put your friends on a pedestal, so you shouldn't do the same with yourself. Just be real with yourself.
I also want to make the point that it's helpful to be outside of yourself too, generally to avoid having your mental state do one of those horny eagle death spirals. It's no different than any other relationship really. You go to your mom for certain things, your partner for others, and your best friend for other things. Variety is the spice of life. Balance. Yin and Yang. All that good stuff.
What I'm trying to say is, just be nice to yourself. Learn to enjoy your own company. Be happy to see yourself in the mirror like you would a friend. If you are struggling, see it like watching a friend struggling and help them get out of the pit.
Take yourself out on dates. Go for walks. Watch movies. Take yourself out to lunch/dinner. Learn how to enjoy your own company, get to know the real you.
Why be your own worst enemy when you could be your own best friend?
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as of writing this...
I decided to take work off today. I didn't sleep super well last night, so when my alarm rang, I said "fuck it" and took the day off. Might go to Olive Garden later, might bring my daughter with me if she wakes up from her nap with enough time before she leaves with Grammy.
I beat the MW2 Remastered campaign last night. I procrastinated on beating "Loose Ends", that mission still fucks me up. Now I'm moving onto the CoD 4 remaster. Going for getting all the intel.